The real reason for one's unhappiness

there are all kinds of tastes in the world, you have your own experience.

Life goes by in a hurry, only to find that the burden on the body is getting heavier and the sorrow in the heart is more and more.

there used to be a hot question: "how long has it been since you laughed?"

all the answers below bear the bitterness and tiredness of adults.

Yes, what people often can't control is their thoughts.

things are impermanent, and life will never be satisfactory, but when you live, you always have to pursue ease and easiness. If you have such a big heart, you will have more worries, less happiness, more sadness, and less happiness.

so, there are many possibilities for people to be unhappy, but the root of it is that you are not smart enough.

01

wishful thinking, too tired

No one can be truly perfect in this life.

in life, many people often talk about "difficult to be a man" and "tired as a man". They feel that life is very complicated and their heart is very tired.

but in fact, life never makes it difficult for anyone.

what makes you miserable is often the imagination that makes you feel miserable.

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A young man looked around for the secret to getting rid of his troubles.

he met a lot of happy people along the way and gained a lot of happy methods. Although he experimented one by one, none of them made him happy.

so he moved on again. He met a smiling old man in the cave and asked him for advice on how to get rid of his troubles.

the old man smiled and asked, "Has anyone tied you up yet?"

the young man replied, "No?"

the old man said, "if no one binds you, how can we talk about liberation?"

the young man thought about it and suddenly realized that he was bound by the psychological cage he had set up.

many people will be confused about their wishful thinking and will find a basis for their wishful thinking.

those guesses, even if they seem reasonable, are just guesses.

make excessive guesses before things happen, either underestimate the enemy or scare yourself.

most of the time, the facts don't make you despair, it's your imagination that makes you despair.

the Master of Silent Heaven in India once said:

be happy because you are content, and those who know how to be content are the easiest to reap happiness.

therefore, it is not easy for people to survive well. Don't let wishful thinking put shackles on yourself.

02

entangling the past is too bitter

Life is a break-up.

in this life, our time and energy are limited, but we are faced with a steady stream of people and things.

Zhihu has a question: "what is the source of pain in life?"

one of the highly praised answers is: "I can't forget, I can't let go, I can't afford to lose."

to put it bluntly, it means thinking about too many useless things and doing too many unnecessary struggles.

the movie "I am not Pan Jinlian" is about a woman who has been entangled with a bad person all her life because of a bad thing.

Li Xuelian, a peasant woman, cheated on her husband Qin Yuhe after a fake divorce. Unreconciled, Li Xuelian angrily sued Qin Yuhe in court.

but in the end, Li Xuelian lost the lawsuit and became known as "Pan Jinlian" from then on.

for this sentence, Li Xuelian began a decades-long road of the petition, and her life fell into an abyss without seeing the bottom, and she was devastated.

Li Xuelian can live in another way.

she can wave goodbye to her bad ex-husband, make a clean break from the bad past and start a new life, instead of spending all the best years of her life tearing up and quarreling with each other.

there is such a line in "Chongqing Forest":

people with real wisdom will never struggle with the past, because they understand that no matter what the past is, the past is in the past, and the best is always waiting for you in the future.

A lot of things, now that they have happened, cannot be changed.

instead of living with worry, it is better to be relieved, be happy, be calm, and face everything in front of you.

so, open up your horizons, broaden your pattern, do not entangle, can you afford and let go, can you enjoy your own wonderful life.

03

people who are self-righteous and stupid

people who have a strong sense of superiority are often stupid.

such people are easy to see through, they are often dressed in the cloak of "excellence", but they are vulnerable.

others have seen through their small thoughts and chose to ignore them, while he is in the game, but he has lost his way.

in ancient times, there was a scholar who was poor in calligraphy but liked to write inscriptions for people everywhere.

once, he attended the elegant Collection, which was a gathering of ancient scholars.

in the crowd, he suddenly found that a man was holding an open fan, the fan was white and clean, and the man knew him very well.

he was so overjoyed that he hurriedly picked up a pen on the table next to him, ran over, snatched the fan, and wrote an inscription.

the other party looked intently, lost in surprise, and immediately fell to his knees with a plop.

he said cheerfully, "it's just a matter of writing a few words, so why to make such a big gift?"

the other person said, "I'm not asking you to write, I'm asking you not to write!"

in life, many people lose not in their ability, but in character, habitually self-righteous and supercilious.

out of the sky one day, there was someone else.

you are not that important at all. Your excellence and invincibility are just an illusion of your own. Without you, the sky will not fall and the earth will not turn.

Smart people understand that only by admitting their shortcomings, appreciating the strengths of others, and learning from each other's strengths can they continue to make progress and grow.

so, people, don't take yourself too seriously, let go of self-righteousness, prejudice, and useless face, who can hurt you?

Life is hard and tiring, but the sun always rises as usual.

Life is like a spring. It can only be perfect if it can bend and stretch.

as the saying goes:

laugh at success or failure, walk forward chic, and never let your heart tire you down. only by being simple and slow can you see the different scenery on the road of life.

May the beauty of the world be closely linked to you. As long as you are not knocked down by setbacks, the sun will always dispel the haze.