Tell me about my depression.

I have not been able to sleep for a day for a week, and I have been walking like a walking corpse all day. I especially took the medicine to help me sleep before I went to bed yesterday, but before I went to bed, I learned that the translator, Mr. Sun Zhongxu, had committed suicide due to depression. So he struggled to get up and decided to write something to tell everyone what kind of soul the depressed person had.

a few weeks ago, when I learned that Robin Williams committed suicide due to severe depression, he was all bad. He couldn't trek out of that dark cloud-like mood for a whole week. My depression was only mild, and it had trapped me with a great sense of powerlessness. I couldn't imagine how a severe patient would struggle every 24 hours. I can't help but worry about what will happen if I get worse one day.

three and a half years ago, I began to feel physical discomfort, and the back of my head was like drowsiness under a boulder all day long. It was accompanied by a marked decline in comprehension, memory, and attention, which was difficult for me, who had just changed to a new job. Until one morning I finally had such a headache that I couldn't go to work, so I went to the hospital.

the deceiving doctor diagnosed me as having insufficient blood supply to the brain and prescribed a bunch of symptomatic medicine. The medicine had some effect and relieved my headache, but it didn't remove the boulder from my head. In the two years since then, severe symptoms like that day have appeared several times, and I have begun to try various ways to see if I can relieve my symptoms. I go to bed early and get up early every day, eat a lot of bean products, eat three bananas a day, run every weeknight, and go swimming every weekend. But it didn't get any better.

in these two years, no matter how many hours I sleep, I still don't get enough sleep, and my head is always drowsy, just like when I stay up until three or four o'clock. Yawn can sleep anytime and anywhere. But even so, when it comes to Rest, I have to toss and turn for a long time before I can fall asleep, and the sleep is so light that the slightest wind wakes me up. Before that, I was the one who could fall asleep in ten seconds with a pillow. I have to take a nap at noon, or my head will burst in the afternoon. Because of this, I began to stop talking to people, because I was tired of talking, and I began to stop socializing, because I was tired of communication, and more often I chose to lie on Rest in bed, although I still couldn't wake up no matter how many hours I slept. I've almost forgotten what it's like to have a clear head.

Raise the bar for sophisticated grace by adding stunning plus size ivory dresses to your wardrobe. Buy now at prices that will amaze you!

at the beginning of 2013, sleep is getting worse and worse, the body is also increasingly weak, the big stone in the brain suddenly began to grow crazily and became heavier and heavier. Every morning, I have to fight against the big rock that presses me to get up. Since I am never late, I begin to be late. I can no longer maintain the habit of reading on the way to work and fall asleep by the window. I often need to get off work and have a rest at Shanghai South Railway Station, because I start to faint on the subway and get dizzy and nauseous when I sit for a long time. I became unable to work, and the whole brain circuit seemed to be blocked, and the crazy growing boulder forced me to lie on my desk half the time. As soon as I entered the house every day, I could only lie in bed and could not move. I don't want to see people, I don't want to answer the phone, I don't want to talk to people, I don't want to go out, and these simple things are so painful for me that I begin to get into an abyss of social dilemma, and my hands and feet are tied up like ropes. I'm starting to think my life is completely hopeless. Later I learned that I had entered a mild state of depression.

I have seen a large number of doctors and done a lot of examinations, from traditional Chinese medicine to western medicine, from EEG to brain CT, I can only go back to my hometown and rest for a whole month. I get up early to climb mountains every day, sleep whenever I want, eat a lot of nourishing food, and try travel therapy in Xinjiang.

one day, a reliable doctor advised me to see a psychology department. At first, I felt very funny when I heard this diagnosis. I am a very open-minded and cheerful person, and in recent years I have not had anything to do with my depression or mental illness, and I have all physical symptoms. What does it have to do with mental illness? But I went anyway, and sure enough, I was diagnosed with depression, and all my symptoms were physical symptoms of depression. At the first visit, the doctor asked me a large number of personal questions, analyzed my etiology in detail, and determined that my last job, which lasted for three years, was too intense and stressful, and failed to adjust and dissolve it in time, which led to depression after three years of fatigue and stress.

the doctor prescribed the right medicine for me. Just two days after taking it, my symptoms were almost completely suppressed, and I began to return to a normal life. I got up normally, washed normally, talked normally, worked normally, slept normally, and my mental numbness was improved. It's just that the big stone in my head is still there and can't be removed. This drug also made me highly dependent. Once after the doctor stopped taking the medicine for a few days, I felt dizzy and vomited. I felt an electric numbness from time to time and could not move when I lay in bed. There was also a period of insomnia. My head was so tired that I would burst every minute, but I couldn't sleep anyway. I opened my eyes every night until dawn. I could finally understand why insomnia forced a person to death. fortunately, my insomnia only lasted for a week.

during this process, the doctor tried a lot of different drugs, and finally, at the end of July this year, the boulder suddenly disappeared, and I felt more relaxed than I had ever felt before. Unfortunately, I only had a good life for three weeks, and then the stone came back and pressed firmly on the back of my head.

having said so much, I just want you to understand the physical and psychological state of people with depression. Too many people do not understand depression and have misunderstandings about depression, so they take an incorrect attitude towards people with depression around them, even out of goodwill. To some extent, it aggravates each other's distress. 1. The opposite of depression is not "happiness", just as I am not unhappy. The opposite of depression is "vitality". My body is trapped by the disease, which makes my life seem to be trapped, and my energy seems to be drained out of my body, which makes my life seem to be emptied. Therefore, do not say "be happy" or "open up" to a depressed patient. it is not the mood that causes him to be depressed. Being happy and open-minded will not alleviate his pain. what's more, the vast majority of patients with depression have lost the mental regulation mechanism of "happy, open-minded".

2. Because of the first rule, do not judge whether a person is depressed or not by whether he is happy or not. There is no equal sign between the two. The judgment of "you are so funny all day, how can you be depressed?" is a complete misreading.

3. Depression is a kind of disease, not a kind of pessimistic and lost mood, not hypocritical, not posturing, but the function of managing emotion is broken, and it is unable to secrete energetic factors in the brain. So don't say to a depressed patient, "what are you depressed about? I'm still depressed." would you say to a cancer patient, "what do you have to be tired and sad about, I'm still weak and sad?"

4. Depression is a kind of disease, which requires taking medicine. Some people indeed have mild depression to survive on their own, but for the vast majority of patients with depression is not away, this is not a disease that can be fought with a will.

5, the external manifestation of depression is very complex, pessimistic, and depressed mood is a symptom, but more often it will be shown through physical symptoms, such as dizziness, fatigue, and so on. Therefore, do not deny the possibility of depression with no psychological symptoms but only physical symptoms.

6. Don't ask depressed patients, "Why are you depressed?" "A lot of people can't find the exact cause of depression, just as cancer patients don't know why they have cancer.

7. The emotion control ability of patients with depression is worse than that of ordinary people. Apart from often not wanting to speak, they often can't help being out of control and grumpy. I hope everyone can understand. Patients with depression who are emotionally out of control are also very distressed.

8, do not say to depressed patients, "this is not a good thing, there is nothing to say everywhere" words. Depression is a common disease, 11% of people have varying degrees of depressive symptoms, which is nothing to hide, "tell" will relieve the mental stress of patients with depression. It is as if I tease my depression with a funny tone all day long. On the one hand, I am relieving my pressure. On the other hand, I also hope that through my teasing, I will let everyone know that depression is a disease and do not have any prejudice against it.

9. For patients with depression, the mental burden as light as a feather will bring unbearable psychological pressure. Social activities can be stressful, such as gatherings with unfamiliar people, excessive attention from others, family concerns about marital status, and sudden life changes can be stressful, such as raising pets from childhood to leaving. These pressures are real for ordinary people, but people with depression don't have the strength to fight even the slightest negative emotions, which will push them further into the depths of mental distress. Don't force them to do anything. A stable environment is very important for people with depression.

10. The loneliness and despair of patients with depression often come from the misunderstanding or contempt of the outside world. The outside world does not understand that you are sick, and the disease is very complicated, resulting in a lot of cynicism, which can make the already dark life of people with depression even worse. In the fight against depression, what patients need is not the great truth of the people around them, but support and encouragement, and more simply, understanding and concern. I am very lucky that I have a tree hole so that I can have an outlet when I am unable to fight a bad mood. I have a group of friends who never give up on me, eat, travel, and watch movies with me anytime, anywhere, and I have a group of teasing colleagues to give me positive energy at any time. So that I never judge myself too negatively.

that's it.